People have probably told you that you are ‘too dramatic’, ‘too sensitive’, ‘quick to cry’, or hopelessly indecisive. But has anyone ever told you that you are also ’empathic’, ‘compassionate’, ‘creative’, ‘easy to trust’ and have an eye for detail? The negative side tends to get magnified, while the other side of the coin gets no recognition. Well, you are not alone. Around 15% to 20% of the population is highly sensitive. It is not a rare personality trait. It simply became marginalised.
What does it mean to be an HSP?
Experts often use the acronym D.O.E.S to explain what high sensitivity entails and honestly, many things fell into place for me.
The ‘D‘ stands for Depth of Processing, here you think deeply. You reflect, analyse, and consider every possible outcome before making a decision, this is why decisions can take longer than others expect. Not because you are indecisive, but because your mind is genuinely processing more.
The ‘O‘ stands for Overstimulation. If you are like me, you know exactly what it feels like to hit a wall. That moment when everything becomes too much all at ones. That’s because your nervous system is wired to pick up on and absorb environmental stimuli more intensely than others, which can make you feel mentally and physically exhausted. Basically means your cup fills up faster. Hunger, stress, or sadness hit harder internally. Loud noises, bright lights, or strong smells can overwhelm you externally. This is your nervous system doing its job, just at a higher volume than most.
The ‘E‘ stands for Emotional Intensity & Empathy and this one is truly a double-edge sword. You feel your own emotions more deeply and you also pick up on and absorb the emotions of the people around you. You feel a broader, richer range of emotional depth, meaning that the highs are breathtaking and the lows can floor you. This is why you cry at a sad film, feel anger at injustice, and stand completely in awe in front of something beautiful. You don’t just observe life. You feel it.
The ‘S‘ stands for Sensory Sensitivity. You notice things that others miss entirely, the subtle shift in someone\s tone, the detail in the corner of a painting, the change in atmosphere when someone walks into a room. In new or unfamiliar situations, you naturally pause, observe, and assess before jumping in. The words often reads this as hesitation, but it is actually awareness.
This is not weakness. It is depth.
Depth of awareness, in paying attention what others don’t deem worthy. Depth in meaningful relationships, where you understand exactly what the other needs before they say it. Depth of love, in what is expressed and in what is absence.
Were you born this way?
Yes. High sensitivity is a genetically rooted personality trait, meaning you have been born with it. That said, certain life experiences can amplify sensitivity over time, but that is a longer conversation for another time. One more thing worth knowing, being an HSP does not mean you tick every box. We are all unique and sensitivity shows up differently in everyone. Some of my most sensitive friends rarely cry, yet they carry a profound sense of empathy and injustice. Sensitivity does not come in one shape.
Lastly, but definitely not least important. High sensitivity is sometimes confused with a disorder, but it is not. It is a distinct personality trait that shapes how you think, how you feel, and how you move through the world.
